When You're Gone
by Siriusgrl88
Summary: Aurora goes to visit Sirius' grave one snowy January evening. Oneshot songfic. It's a lot better than it seems. Please R&R!


Sirius Cygnus Black, James Potter, Lily Potter (nee Evans) (C) Jo Rowling

Aurora Clementine Black (nee Badeau) (C) me :)

When You're Gone (C) Avril Lavigne and what not

Read and review please! Enjoy.

!!!!!!!!!! SPOILERS FOR MY FANFIC: THE STORY BEFORE THE STORY. AND FOR SOME OF JO'S BOOKS; shame on you for not reading the books before reading fanfics !!!!!!!!!!

!!!! This has been edited from its original version. It has been formatted to fit this screen (jk haha but it has been edited) !!!!

* * *

A shaft of sunlight fell across the cold floor of Aurora's room. The sun was rising and the sky was changing from a light blue to streaks of pink, orange, and yellow. It was a cold January morning and Aurora laid in her bed, snuggled deep under her covers in her room at Hogwarts. 

As the sun rose, so did the hour. Soon, it was 7 in the morning and Aurora sat up as her alarm went off. She hit the snooze and stretched while yawning. She got out of the warm bed and quickly put her robe and slippers on before padding into her bathroom to get ready for her classes. The students were back from their vacations and today she would be seeing Annalisa, Harry, Ron, and Hermione in one of her classes. She was ready within half an hour and then out her bedroom door. She headed to the Great Hall for breakfast, passing students, ghosts, pets, and teachers on the way. No one spoke to her.

She made it into the Great Hall and went to the staff table. Dumbledore sat in the middle, flanked by Minerva and Filius, whom were flanked by Hagrid and Pomona. Aurora saw Severus and they briefly made eye contact. She sat in her seat and had her breakfast. Everyone chatted to each other then but Aurora tried to keep to herself. She didn't want to talk today. Soon classes were starting and her first was with a group of seventh years from Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff. The class went on without a hitch and soon she was done with all of her classes except for one; the one with Annalisa, Harry, Ron, Hermione, and the rest of the fifth year Gyrffindor House and fifth year Ravenclaw House.

But even that class went off without any problems and without anyone talking to her. They were practicing Occlumency that day and Hermione wasn't doing so well as she tried to close her mind off to Annalisa and it was ticking her off. Aurora had to tell her once to calm down and be patient. Soon the class was over and the students left; only Annalisa, Harry, Ron, and Hermione hung back afterwards. Aurora was organizing papers as she sat behind her desk in the classroom when the four sixteen year olds strode up to her desk, looking a bit nervous. She glanced up at them after a few short moments, a questioning look in her very clear, very blue eyes.

"Mum…Are you ok?" Annalisa asked, her grey eyes that she inherited from her father were concerned as she worried her bottom lip.

"Why would you ask?" Aurora entwined her fingers together and placed her attached hands on her desk, her eyes on the four teens before her.

"Well…I mean, you've been very quiet today," Annalisa answered and Hermione broke in.

"You only spoke to us when you told us to start the lesson and when you gave out homework…Oh and when you told me to calm down and be patient."

"And?"

"Mum…We're worried. What's wrong?"

Aurora sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, her eyes closing. No one but the staff knew what the day was to Aurora; not even her own children knew. "It's my anniversary…" She replied softly and the four teens stood silently, blinking at her in confusion. She opened her eyes and looked at her daughter, her blue eyes locking with Annalisa's grey ones. "It's the seventeenth anniversary of my marriage to your father, Annalisa." Annalisa gasped softly and became quite sad very suddenly, her eyes filling with tears. Hermione and Ron rubbed her back and Harry looked very surprised, as if he were in a daze. "Get to your dinner. I won't be joining you." They all nodded and left the room, leaving Aurora alone to herself.

Tears pricked her own eyes as she thought about her marriage. Seventeen years married and only three years and nine months of those years were actually spent together… she thought sadly. Aurora stood, wiping at her eyes as she made her way to her room and got ready for traveling. She put a thick, long warm coat on, buttoning it to her collarbone. She wrapped a Ravenclaw scarf around her neck and slipped black mittens onto her hands before she grabbed her purse and left the room and then the classroom. She made her way through the quiet school and was able to get out of Hogwarts without anyone noticing.

_I always needed time on my own  
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry  
And the days feel like years when I'm alone  
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side  
_

Aurora walked into Hogsmeade and stopped by the Three Broomsticks. She slid into an alley right next to the building and then twirled, thinking of Godric's Hollow. Everything was black as she held her breath while she Disapparated. She Apparated just outside of the little, sleepy village; she walked into it, her mitten-clad hands stuffed into the pockets of her jacket. Since the sun was just now slipping down from the sky, changing the colors of the sky again, there were still residents outside of their homes; not many though because it was so cold. A cold, sharp wind rushed around her, making her hair flutter around her face as she trudged through the snow covered street.

_When you walk away I count the steps that you take  
Do you see how much I need you right now  
_

She ignored all of the residents of Godric's Hollow as she ambled on. Besides, her mind was elsewhere at the moment. She was having flashbacks of every memory she had of her and Sirius, some including their friends James, Lily, Remus, Andromeda, Pippa, and their former friend Peter.

_When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone  
The face I came to know is missing too  
When you're gone  
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok  
I miss you_

The first time she met him, with James sitting across from him in the compartment on the train; the first time he teased her in their second year; the first time she jinxed him after he called her a brat when they were in their third year; the first time she really yelled at him when they were in their fourth year after he had flirted with her and asked her to go out with him; the first time they actually got along, shocking James and Lily; their first kiss in Hogsmeade; their first date in Hogsmeade in a little clearing that he had set a picnic up in; the time when they got caught snogging in an abandoned classroom by Professor McGonagall.

_I've never felt this way before  
Everything that I do reminds me of you  
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor  
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do  
_

Their first break-up; their first make-up; the first time they made love; the next day when he asked her to marry him; their wedding day, or rather night because it was almost midnight when they did get married; the birth of their daughter and first child; the birth of their second child and first son; James and Lily's death, the same night that he was sent to jail for a crime he never committed; the night he broke out of jail and she read about it in the Daily Prophet; the night she saw the Grim in her backyard; the night she finally saw him again since 1981.

The coupling that led to her conceiving their next two children; the nights she spent with him while she was pregnant and he was on the run; the time they spent together at 12 Grimmauld Place during Annalisa's fifth year at Hogwarts. Then the last memory…

_When you walk away I count the steps that you take  
Do you see how much I need you right now  
_

The night before he died, they had spent together, making love and just talking. Then Severus had shown up and barged into Sirius' room. Sirius had become enraged as Aurora squeaked and hid under the covers. Severus turned his back immediately but stayed in the room. He spoke to Sirius and Aurora, telling them that Harry had had a vision of Sirius being held hostage at the Department of Mysteries in the Ministry of Magic and that he was being tortured. Sirius sprung out of the bed and dressed quickly, as did Aurora. She went to follow him but he insisted that she stay there.

"If we both go, we risk losing both of our lives…Our children need at least one of us alive. I'm choosing you; they've had you their whole lives and only had me for a couple of years. They'd be devastated if they lost you." She had protested but he had argued back, telling her that she had no choice; she had to stay behind. She had refused and it had resulted in a long argument that was only ended when Severus told Aurora that she was to stay at 12 Grimmauld Place. Aurora had cursed but finally conceded before she kissed and hugged Sirius and told him that if he better come back or she'd kill him. She had watched him, Remus, Shacklebolt, Moody, and Tonks leave together, a heavy stone settling at the bottom of her stomach. She had stayed downstairs with Severus but after about an hour, Aurora got too antsy and left, Severus yelling at her to come back that instant while she Disapparated out of the front yard. She was hoping that she got to the Ministry before it was too late. She wanted to help.

She arrived at the same time as the Minister and his Aurors. She saw Harry on the floor with Annalisa standing above him, her wand raised, and Dumbledore kneeling by Harry's side. She went to her daughter, who was bloody and bruised and that's when Annalisa put Sirius' wedding band in Aurora's hand. Aurora knew what it meant immediately and she clung to her daughter and sons. She checked on Harry briefly before Dumbledore told her to go to the room where Sirius had died. She did and she saw the Death Eaters there with Remus, Shacklebolt, Tonks, and Moody guarding them. She had approached the veiled archway that had taken her husband and she had fallen to her knees in front of it, sobbing. She felt as if she were breaking completely; her heart ached and her soul was shattering.

_When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone  
The face I came to know is missing too  
When you're gone  
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok  
I miss you_

Aurora hadn't realized that she was already at the cemetery. She blinked and stared at the kissing gate that was right before her, all of the old memories leaving her at once. She slowly reached out and pushed it open. It was dark now as she weaved in and out of the graves and tombstones. And finally, she found them all. Now she stood before two graves that were covered in soft, pure white snow. She pulled her mittens off and pushed them down into her pocket before she pulled her wand out. She waved her wand gently in the air and a small bouquet of Lilies of the Valley, blue salvias, and yellow roses appeared in front of her. With another small wave of her wand a sunny yellow ribbon wrapped and tied around the stems. She gently grabbed them and knelt down to place them on James' and Lily's grave.

"I miss you guys…" She whispered and wiped a single tear from her cheek as she sniffled and slowly removed the snow from their names on the stone with one finger. "Harry is amazing. I wish you were here to see him. He's very brave and clever, like you, James, but he's rational and stubborn like you, Lil. I love you two so much…I wish I were with you…"

_We were made for each other  
Out here forever  
I know we were, yeah  
All I ever wanted was for you to know  
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul  
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah_

She sighed and moved to the stone just to the right of James. She removed the snow from the name there as well. She then gently waved her wand and had a single blooming red rose floating in front of her. She waved her wand again and some lavender surrounded the rose and then some red tea roses surrounded the lavender; the single blooming red rose remained in the center of the bouquet. A dark sapphire blue ribbon shot out of her wand next and wrapped and tied around the stems. She delicately seized the bouquet and laid it at the base of the stone. Tears were freezing against her cheeks as she cried silently, her eyes gazing at the engraving on the dark granite headstone.

_**Sirius Cygnus Black**_

_**April 24, 1960-June 20, 1996**_

_**Beloved Husband and Cherished Father and Godfather**_

"_**There Are Things Worth Dying For."**_

_When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone  
The face I came to know is missing too  
When you're gone  
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok  
I miss you_

Aurora looked at the empty expanse of stone next to Sirius' information and read it.

_**Aurora Clementine Black (nee Badeau)**_

_**July 4, 1960-**_

She knew that there was room for her beneath the ground with his empty coffin and that one day, her own information would be on the smooth surface of the stone too. She wished she could join him now, but she knew that there were still many things she had left to do before she joined him again. She sighed softly and sniffled as she shakily wiped the wetness from her cheeks and eyes.

She slowly stood, straightening her back as she looked down upon her husband's headstone. The dark granite and light snow shimmered in the moonlight, as if taunting her. She turned on her heel and walked only a few feet away before she looked over her shoulder. "There has never been, and never will be, another, Sirius…I love you," she whispered softly to him and looked ahead again, blinking back stubborn tears. And then she was leaving the cemetery and was gone from Godric's Hollow.

* * *

Flower Meanings 

James' and Lily's flowers: 1) Lily of the valley - sweetness; return to happiness; humility

2) Rose(yellow) - Friendship

3) Salvia(blue) - I think of you

Sirius' flowers: 1) Lavender - Devotion

2) Rose(tea rose, red) - I'll always remember

3) Single red rose in bloom - I love you; I still love you

Color Meanings (ribbons)

Lily's and James' ribbon: Yellow - Hope, friendship, optimism, intelligence.

Sirius' ribbon: Blue - Loyalty, patience, understanding, devotion.


End file.
